The Fab Fifty: Tips on how to continue loving, styling, and being yourself in an anti-aging society
Meet Lisa Hale: the fashionista and stylist that is breaking the barrier between beauty and ageism as a modern day "glam-ma"
Motherhood doesn't have an expiration date nor does it end simply because your kids are grown. Too often do we (mothers) find ourselves so absorbed in rearing our children that we fail to contemplate on life after the "nest" has emptied. Suddenly, the time creeps up, the kids are gone, and we either try to find out who we are or just give up. I know, this hasn't happened to me yet so how can I even begin to give advice? I can't. However, I've seen the pattern repeat itself within my family. So, I know this is a subject that NEEDS to be talked about. Well when you do not know, you ask. I happened to ask Lisa Hale (The Silver Stylist), an entrepreneur, stylist, blogger, mother, AND grandmother. She has not only experienced the "empty nest" syndrome, she has seen it happen to other mothers as well. Check out her perspective on beauty, life over fifty, styling, and tapping into your identity below:
- Over the years you have transitioned from several career paths, did it ever scare you to start a new career? At 56 years old, I have learned that I am never too old to recreate myself and start something new. Transitioning between different careers was easy for me because I was not scared of the unknown. I jumped in with both feet in and I pursued passion over fear.
- What is your advice to women who deal with the fear of failure? If I never ventured out, I would never know. Fear of failing cannot be an excuse, with failure comes a lesson. So what if you take two steps and make a mistake. It does not mean that you cannot go to the right or left to overcome that mistake. You are only failing when you stop going for what you want completely.
- Working in the retail industry for so long, have you seen firsthand what happens to women after their children have left home? I have seen women give their heart and soul to their children, and than the kids leave and go to school. Once the children are gone, they are forced to try to understand who they are. They have no idea who they are, how to feel beautiful, how to dress, or how to start understanding themselves. It is heartbreaking watching someone look so lost and without an identity.
- What is your advice to women who are trying to “find their identity” after their kids are grown? Do not let age or where you are at in life discourage you from getting back to what makes you feel beautiful. If we looked back at great leaders who were afraid of evolving where would we be? Ask yourself, what is it that I like? What drives me? For me, I thrive off the energy of others; I am a people person. Therefore, I focus on how to recreate myself with that. Understand your personality, maybe get a part-time job, and volunteer somewhere to take the focus off yourself. Be around people, it gives you the opportunity to dress yourself up and feel like you are still a part of something. Serving and helping others is like a gift, you are rewarded for it internally. It highlights the positive things about you and shows you other parts of you to work on.
- What are some of your favorite store to shop? A lot of my stuff is from Target, TJ Max, Old Navy, Nordstrom Rack, Buffalo Exchange, and..... thrift stores. Some of my favorite and classic pieces I got from thrift shopping.
- What styling advice would you give to mothers trying to look good on a budget? It is all on how you put your pieces together. Our society has this concept of disposable clothing but I have had a lot of my clothing from years ago. If you do not buy super faddish and instead buy a little more conservative, classic, pieces you can re-wear them throughout the seasons. My advice would be to look at the key colors for the seasons and interchange them throughout the years. Fashion always comes back. You can invest into an item and mix it with cheaper items in different styles. I get amused when people say, “these are the number of items you need per season”. Seasonal items center on you and your individual day to day. So, base your “invested pieces” around your lifestyle. Style is not as cut and dry as people try to make it. It is personal and it is individual to who you are and what you do.
- Is there a stigma correlated with age and beauty? A lot of the stigma has been created by marketing and advertisements in our society. We have deemed being youthful as the center of everything. While youth is wonderful, a certain peace and confidence comes with age and wisdom. Of course, we want to stay young and keep up our appearance. However, the emphasis put on staying young puts insecurities on women. It makes them change completely who they are and often we let it define who we are. As women, we have to embrace aging, as we do love, growth, accomplishments, and everything else good in life.
- What advice would you give to older women who are afraid they come off as “trying to look young” if they wear makeup, loud prints, etc.? I am not going to go around trying to please everyone. If you feel good in it and you can hold your head up high, than wear it! If you have kept yourself in good shape, be confident and proud of it. Wear what you want to wear and stop being concerned about what someone is going to say. You can recreate yourself and alter your ego whenever you want. There is no shame in that. I think women get fearful of what other people are going to say…. At this age, liberate yourself and live your life for yourself. Ask yourself are you restricting your clothing because of rules that you’ve put on yourself or are they rules that you think society has placed on you?
- You have experienced wife-hood, motherhood, grandmother-hood, and still managed to stay true to womanhood as well. What is the most important lesson you have learned? Things that I worried about when I was younger were not important. What is important is people. We are people, helping each other, loving each other, and giving someone a smile. People spend so much time being critical and not loving. Learn to love and get along; spread that energy whenever you can. Ask yourself, how well do you love people? If you have to think about it than love a little harder. That is what is important and that is what has remained constant throughout every stage of my life.